Have you heard of this little thing called 'Mommy Wars?' If not, you're lucky. Let me take a second to give my two cents on the matter here. Along the way I'll sprinkle some mean-spirited eCards I've seen floating out there on the internet (**I'll insert my foul language warning here**), just as an example of what parents today exposed to in regards to the personal choices they make for their families. These are really charming (typed in sarcasm font).
"Mommy wars" is a media-derived term which pits working mothers against their dreaded foe - the stay-at-home mom. Each side of the supposed war has their opinion on what is best way for a family to function. Each side loves to play in the "pain Olympics" on who has it worse. Is it the poor stay-at-home mom who never gets a break, feels like she is losing her identity, struggles to find time for herself? Or is it the working mom, constantly trying to find balance and time to keep her work life and family life afloat and feeling like she's failing at both? Both sides sound pretty miserable, right?.
First and foremost, let me express my deep gratitude to my friends and family, who are amazing enough to not partake in the petty comparison, judgements, and passive aggressiveness that make up "mommy wars." I'm proud to say that I surround myself with the type of gal who does the best she can for her family, and realizes that all of her mom friends are also doing the best for their family - even if it's very different than the choices she's made.
Nowadays, mommy wars happen over almost every major parenting decision one can make. I've read and heard heated arguments over breast vs. bottle feeding, extended rear facing vs. front facing car seats, baby led weaning vs. purees, and attachment vs. "free range" parenting (just to name a few). You name it and somewhere out there, someone has an opinion that they take as Gospel and expect you to do the same.
The problem lies in being "too connected" I think. There are so many wonderful aspects of being "plugged in" online. I learned tips and tricks online that made my first year with Kate a hell of a lot easier. However, there is so much information out there regarding pregnancy and parenting (and every other facet of human existence) that you can easily lose your instinct for what works for your family. I also think that this wealth of information is drowning out the best resource of all - those who have come before us within our own family. Moms and dads who came before us have a lot of wisdom to share. What is we couldn't run and consult Dr. Google every time our baby had the sniffles?
Don't misunderstand me. There are things every generation did that are better left in the past - I mean, do we really need to go back to letting our children stand on our laps in the front seat of the car while cruising down the highway at 80 MPH? No. But, I think sometimes we should trust our instinct and listen to the voices of those close to us, who love and care for us. Maybe we can all just live and let live when it comes to other people's choices in parenting, ...and heck, really every aspect of life.
Nailed it.
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