Warning: This is a long one!
My purpose for this post wasn’t to focus purely on the physical happenings of Kate’s birth, but on how I felt and the emotions tied to that important day (i.e. I didn’t go into awkward details or gory stuff, so have no fear!) and although this is ultimately for me and Adam to document this amazing transition in our lives, I hope you enjoy it too!
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I want to put Kate's birth story in writing before I start to lose the memories and details of the day she was born. I can't believe it's been over 5 months since she arrived. Her birth turned out to be such an amazing, beautiful and yet intensely trying time for me. I want to put down in words just how monumental those hours and minutes before and after Kate made her grand entrance into this world were.
They changed me. They sculpted me. They have set the tone for who I am now as a mother and who I will become in the future.
I'm not the type who dreamt of becoming a mother since she was a tiny girl. However, I was the type of person who, for reasons I didn't know then, but I'm beginning to understand now, wanted to experience childbirth. I wanted to be part of the "club", exchange that knowing glance with women who have also carried and given birth to a child. It was a bucket list experience I've checked off...and look forward to doing again someday, God willing.
The day before Kate was born, a Saturday, started like most weekends while I was in the last stages of pregnancy. I went on a mad cleaning streak before collapsing, exhausted and worn out, in the afternoon. Around 5:30pm I was sitting on my couch watching one of my favorite movies, The Shawshank Redemption, for the 1,000th time. It was the part when Andy DuFrain says, "I understand you're a man who knows how to get things" when my water broke. I don't feel there is any need to go into details about it here, but there was absolutely no question in my mind that is what happened. Fortunately, Adam had called and told me he was on his way home after coaching volleyball for 10+ hours.
Within 5 minutes Adam was home. As he wearily climbed the stairs he moaned, "I need a beer" to which I responded, "my water broke". At this point, I started to get scared and asked Adam a couple times if we could just stay home for a while and see what happens. I thought I was ready, but really I still had 10 days until this baby was supposed to arrive and even then I had spent most of my pregnancy prepping myself to go another 7+ days after our September 26th due date, after all that's what the majority of my girlfriends experienced! Adam, however, had kicked into high gear. He knew that we needed to get our stuff together and head to the hospital so they could monitor me. I wasn't having contractions (that I could feel) yet, but now that my water had broken, Kate and I were both susceptible to issues if she wasn't born relatively soon.
So, off to the hospital we went. It was the only time until after Kate was born that I cried. I was just scared. Scared about the pain that was sure to come, but also scared about the prospect of everything I knew changing forever. I was scared about becoming a mother.
The hours after we were admitted were somewhat of a blur. At that point it was the middle of the night and we were both pretty tired. My parents showed up sometime before midnight and popped in to say hello before going to our house to sleep. I had been texting people on and off since we were admitted. Despite all of this I felt very alone, but not in a bad way. I felt gathered...collected. I took that time to wrap my head around what was happening and focus on what I needed to do over the next 24 hours to welcome my daughter safely and happily into this world.
Adam and I tried to sleep, but I wasn't able to catch more than 2 hours on and off all night. I had two monitors strapped to my huge, perfectly round stomach, so they kept slipping every time I moved. I also had been hooked into a Pitocin drip sometime after midnight when they realized I wasn't progressing fast enough. The Pitocin helped speed up the labor, but I was very disappointed that I now had a medication in my system. I had taken 10 weeks of Bradley Method classes to prepare me to go without unnecessary medicine during labor and delivery. I really wanted to be med-free and not chained to an IV pole as I labored, but I was also flexible and understood why I needed it, this was necessary. They had let me labor on my own for more than 5 hours to see how far I progressed and it just wasn't enough. My labor nurse, Tracey, was awesome. She had 2 of her 3 kids without an epidural, but with Pitocin, so she knew the challenges I would be facing and guided them through me with tough love and encouragement.
The pain of contractions actually surprised me. I feel like early labor is a lot like distance running (and I just might know a little thing about running). It's 10% physical 90% mental. The pain, for me, wasn't intense at all, but it wore me down, dealing with a semi-strong contraction every 2 or 3 minutes, hour after hour. By sunrise I had been at it for over 12 hours and according to the OB on rotation at the time, I had about another 6 hours before they would start to consider a C-section.
Around 9 in the morning the pain became very intense. I had hemmed and hawed about getting an epidural prior to that moment (I true sign that I didn't really need one...in my opinion) but at this point, I had Adam by the arm demanding him to get the anesthesiologist NOW! I'll never forget what Adam said after that - "I think you are in transition." I just had to laugh. It turns out he HAD been listening in the birth classes after all. He grabbed our nurse who confirmed that I was 9.5 cm...Almost 10. It took another 2 hours before I was ready to push, but knowing I was so close made the choice not to get an epidural easier....but, those were the longest 2 hours of my life.
Then it was time to push and push I did for 2 more hours. I made great progress and actually started to fall asleep between pushes. I had basically been up for 27 hours now and I was beat. We had passed the magic 18 hour mark from when the OB wanted Kate out, but I was so so close she let me keep going rather than resort to a C-section...for that I am eternally grateful. The entire time Adam stood by my side, helping me count. He held my hand, held my leg...gave me strength and reassurance and encouragement the whole time. He told me, "You're doing it! You're doing great!" so many times. It was the best display of love I've ever received from him.
Finally, at 1:01pm on Sunday September 16th, 19 hours after my water broke, Katherine Quinn entered the world. She came out with a raspy, angry cry. The best sound a momma can hear. They cleaned her and weighed her - 8lbs 6oz! She was a big girl for being 10 days early! She had a head full of dark hair and she was the most beautiful thing I'd ever seen.
Unfortunately, shortly after she was born I started losing way more blood than the OB and nurses were comfortable with. I was suffering from postpartum hemorrhaging. Something common, apparently, for redheads to experience. Well, the steps that were taken to make that bleeding stop made labor and delivery without pain medicine a joke. It was bad. Very bad. Adam took Kate out of the room for most of it because I could not handle the pain I was experiencing. Luckily, they were able to stop the bleeding and patch me up so I could get Kate back into my arms, but it was certainly scary and excruciatingly painful for a while.
 In the end, though it didn't matter, none of the scary parts even factor in to how amazing her birth was. We did it. We made it safely to the other side of pregnancy...and most importantly we made it peacefully and joyfully together as a little family. 
That night I barely slept at all. I lay in bed, in the darkness of our room while Adam slept on the couch and just stared at our baby while I held her. My little miracle. I read a quote in a book recently that perfectly sums up my birth experience, it reads, "It was as though having a baby made all the fairy tales come true for her, as though she were a painter who discovered a color all new to the world." Nothing was closer to the truth than that quote in those moments shortly after I had Kate. It was the most beautiful experience of my life and continues to be every day since…
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